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Open Mouth, Insert Foot {and other Burnt Offerings}

I like feet.  Little ones, to be exact.

Full Swing

Especially when stocking covered or cowgirl boot clad, and in mid swing.

Kick Your Heels Up

That’s when I love feet.

{and thus, I become said foot photographer}

But my feet.  They’re a whole ‘nother story.

You see, I have this adorable pair of ribbon-covered ballet flats that I acquired on super clearance at Target {which instantly makes them even cuter} and to say they have been adequately worn and thoroughly loved would be a massive understatement. 

I heart them.

And due to the consistency of this relationship, any amount of “foot warmth” inside them causes their…hmm, let’s call it “aroma”…to pour forth.  It’s enough to make your nostril hair curl.  My husband forbids me from removing these shoes in the car when it’s cold and the heat is on because the heat just pumps the smell upward.  He subsequently dry heaves and then threatens to throw the shoes, along with my aromatic feet, out of the window. 

Keeping these suckers on in the car is hard for a girl who would be barefoot year round if at all possible, and who loves to sit cross-legged in the passenger-seat.  Barefoot, of course. 

But out of my fierce allegiance to these shoes love for my husband, I keep them on.  Tucked as far under my seat and away from the heating vent as possible. 

Truly…these shoes have a personality all their own.

I donned these babies all weekend at the conference we were at in Grand Rapids.  And then promptly inserted one of them – in all it’s glory – into my mouth.

Allow me to explain.

The bible talks about feet and how lovely the ones that bring good news are.  I’d like to say that mine always rush to share good news.  But that would be a fib.  A considerably enormous one.

You see, my filter malfunctions on a relatively frequent basis.  I rush over to share something that pops into my noodle without first stopping to think about the weight or value of what I’m spewing forth.  What kind of impact will this information have on the other person?  Will it encourage or graciously challenge them, or simply pass along frivolous, and potentially destructive, information?

My tongue just flaps, and then as my words start to settle in, I start to recoil and revisit them.

I did that this weekend.

I spotted this guy I hadn’t seen for about 11 years, since I was a youth leader at our old church, and thought it would be good to reconnect with him.

Oh, how I wish I could just leave it there.

You should know…he didn’t really remember me.  At all.  But I remembered him alright.  I had had a mad crush on him {I was nineteen and obsessed}, and for some unknown reason, I thought it would be a good idea to walk up to him and, out of the blue, blurt out this little morsel of information.

“Yeah, so…hi…remember me…?…I like totally had the biggest crush on you for years…{insert awkward laugh}.  Just thought you’d be amused to know…{insert more awkward laughter now that he’s squirming and looking at me like I have a booger on my forehead}…how funny it that?”

{awkward silence}

Why in the name of all that is good and holy would I see value in sharing something so pointless?

I’ll admit, I thought we could all stand around and share a laugh about it.  But I’m weird like that.  He didn’t think it was funny.  He was downright uncomfortable.

So I sheepishly stuck up my left hand and said, “I’m happily married…I’m not hitting on you…just hadn’t seen you in years…and…well…sorry”, I slunk back into the crowd.

Turns out he’s not married yet.  And he’s shy.  And is clearly weirded out by strange women who declare past love for him as he walks through the door of a church.

Ahem.

I could see how that would be a little unsettling.

Doh.

Needless to say, every time we walked past each other, it was a little tense. 

My husband had a good chuckle.  And then sussed him out.  Which I’m sure made the poor guy even more uncomfortable.

And the silly part of all of this was, it didn’t have to be that way.  If I had have just kept my mouth shut and shared the giggles with my sisters instead {who happened to remember him from youth group}, I would have avoided all the awkwardness of the encounter.  And, here’s the part that weighs on me, freed him up to focus on what God had for him that night…rather than sift through the obvious emotions I tapped with my unfiltered drivel.

Open mouth, insert foot.

My filter needs to be fixed.  Or maybe it’s not that it’s broken…possibly it’s just that I don’t pause long enough to utilize it before sharing my infinite pearls of wisdom {sarcasm most definitely intended}.

And speaking of brilliant moves…look what I made for lunch:

Burnt Offerings

Close mouth, order Chinese.

{Apparently I need a little more practice in using the broiler…and my filter!}

Related posts:

  1. At The Well: Guest Post {2 Ears, 1 Mouth}
  2. 52 Little Lines with Big Benefits
  3. An Open Letter to my Mother
  4. All in a Week’s Whirl
«
»

Daily Life, Keepin' it Real

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Simply Bloom exists to empower women to embrace their stories, live out their passion with purpose, and leave a legacy of love.
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Hello there! I'm Joy. Speaker, designer, author & coach, and creator of the #weROARproject. Welcome to Simply Bloom Co., where passion & purpose collide.

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May you remember that God is not only the God of d May you remember that God is not only
the God of destinations, but of detours.

When life takes you somewhere you never intended to go,
may you recognize that you have not been forgotten.

May you have eyes to see the people in front of you,
hands willing to gather the sticks,
courage to shake off the snakes,
a heart willing to welcome and be welcomed,
and faith to believe that even here,
especially here, God is at work.
What if the place you keep calling a detour is act What if the place you keep calling a detour is actually part of the story?

Paul was headed to Rome. Instead, he ended up shipwrecked on Malta.
It wasn't the destination. But it mattered.

A reminder for all of us: don't waste the waiting,
the detour, or the place you didn't choose.

🎙️ 042 | Make Malta Matter | Finding Purpose in Divine Detours
  The latest Oh, Good Grief Podcast episode is out now.

#OhGoodGriefPodcast #MakeMaltaMatter #SimplyBloomCo
Instagram post 17924817765424628 Instagram post 17924817765424628
What if the years you thought were wasted… weren't What if the years you thought were wasted…
weren't wasted at all?

In Part 2 of my conversation with Leah Harvey,
we go deeper into what it means to trust
God when the outcome is still unknown.

Leah has spent years carrying the ache of infertility,
and she doesn't offer a tidy answer or a spiritual shortcut.

Instead, she talks about restoration.
About eternity.
About choosing Jesus over her preference.
About looking for treasure in the middle of the story.

And about the surprising realization that there
may not have been wasted years after all,
because God was present in every one of them.

He is.
Even here.
Even now.

🎧 Part Two with Leah Harvey is live now.

#OhGoodGriefPodcast #StruggleWell #StayRooted #SojournTogether
Instagram post 18091972097640684 Instagram post 18091972097640684
What if trusting that God is good doesn't mean bel What if trusting that God is good doesn't mean
believing He will give us everything we ask for?

That's one of the questions my friend Leah Harvey
and I wrestle with in this week's episode.

Leah and her hubby, Jake, have walked through years
of infertility and the kind of unanswered prayer that
doesn't just hurt once—it asks you to keep
trusting God over and over again.

We talk about grief, surrender, the questions we sometimes feel afraid to ask, and what happens when we stop trying to put tidy answers over messy pain.

This is a tender conversation about choosing Jesus over our preferences, embracing the mystery of God, and learning to believe that His goodness doesn't depend on whether He gives us the thing we're asking for.

Part One of my conversation with Leah Harvey is live now
🎧  040 | The Goodness of God in the Waiting

#OhGoodGriefPodcast #StruggleWell #StayRooted #SojournTogether
Before the world told you who you needed to become Before the world told you who you needed to become...
Before fear taught you how to survive...
Before shame convinced you to hide...
God looked at you and called you His own.

Not because you had healed.
Not because you had figured yourself out.
Not because you had become your best self.
Simply because you were His.

You are still becoming.
And you are already loved.

Keep coming home.

#OhGoodGriefPodcast #SimplyBloomCo
What if the goal isn't to become a different type, What if the goal isn't to become a different type,
but to become more fully yourself?

We've spent the last several weeks exploring the Enneagram:
our gifts, wounds, coping strategies, and the stories we
learned to believe in order to survive.

Now it's time to come home.

Episode 039 closes this Summer Series by asking
what happens when self-awareness becomes surrender.

The Enneagram can help us understand our patterns.
But it was never meant to become our identity.

You are not your number.
You are not your trauma.
You are not your coping strategy.

You are a beloved child of God.

🎧 Oh, Good Grief — Episode 039 is available now.
Sitting on the front porch with a cup of coffee, m Sitting on the front porch with a cup of coffee, my Bible and a book of maps in my lap, and the sun on my face, has me thinking about how strange and beautiful life can be.

It’s no small honor to be given the opportunity to preach at our church from time to time. Had you told the broken, shoplifting, lying, giving-her-body-away-for-free teenage girl I once was that one day she’d stand in a pulpit and talk to people about God’s goodness and grace, I would have laughed at you.

But maybe that’s exactly why God delights in using the messy, the unlikely, the misfits. Because these are the stories that make His redemption impossible to miss.

One of my favorite lines from The Chosen, spoken by Mary Magdalene, sums it up perfectly: “I was one way, and now I am completely different. And the thing that happened in between was Him.”

That’s my story, too.
And if I were to hazard a guess, it's yours as well.

It’s one of my greatest joys to dig into God’s Word, share what He’s laid on my heart, offer some encouragement and conviction, confess the uncomfortable things, and ultimately point people back to Jesus.

Because there’s no denying the extraordinary power of redemption when you’ve lived it yourself.
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