I connected with this beautiful SoCal wife and momma through the Influence Network, and have loved watching her step more fully into her strengths and giftings as a writer over the past few months.
Her story of choosing obedience over hustle will challenge and encourage you to more bravely and wholeheartedly trust God with your hopes and dreams while raising up the little lives you’ve been entrusted with.
Meet Malinda…
What’s your story, morning glory?
About a year ago, after wrestling with God about it for months, we started exploring the option of homeschool. Note: I did not want to. I was somewhat against the idea; I was working part-time, and trying to write more regularly. The more research I did, the more I felt incredibly unqualified. But, we started anyway. My oldest was only in kindergarten and my thought was, ‘I can’t mess it up too much. I just have to get her reading.”
A couple months into the fall I realized that it wasn’t going well. I wasn’t doing well. I was being stretched too thin. And we really weren’t thriving at anything, because I was trying to do everything. While at a women’s conference, in a quiet moment with God, I heard Him whisper, “do you trust me?” My answer was “yes, of course, Lord.” But I remember feeling doubt when He told me to quit my job.
My hesitation was due to the fact that my husband works for a church. Yes, the non-profit salary. We also live in a very expensive zip code and had just increased our rent by moving into a house (so that we could host family and friends). When we did the math, it was ridiculous to think that I could quit my steady job to be home full time and homeschool. But, again, we did the crazy thing.
I quit 4 weeks before Christmas, which was horrible timing with travel to see family, gift-giving and all the other expenses involving the holiday looming over us. But God asked us to trust Him, and we did. The most amazing part of the story is that my husband has had extra work every month since I quit. These side projects have brought in more money than I had been making. Every month. Without fail.
And the little bits of writing that I had been doing— all of a sudden the doors started opening up. Online and print magazines, devotionals, guest blogging, speaking opportunities— the dam broke and suddenly the hard work was starting to gain momentum. Again, I’m pretty sure God was waiting for me to relinquish control so He could do His thing. He gets the credit this way.
What did you discover about yourself?
I am still a recovering control freak. As the keeper of the checkbook and family calendar, there have been some anxiety driven days as I wonder where the money is going to come from. The last 7 months have been an incredible faith walk and God has never failed us.
I’ve learned that when God asks us to trust Him, it’s not just a blanket statement. Sometimes it’s very specific. And hard. And you don’t want to. And you try, and then doubt, and then surrender.
What did you discover about God’s character in the process?
He’s so faithful. Even when I’m not. Even when I don’t deserve it. And nothing surprises Him.
What helped you or served you most practically in this season?
I’ve had so many people say, “wow, I could never do that” and I smile. I understand the sentiment, but the truth is when God asks us to skydive it’s usually after He’s spent time preparing us. He doesn’t just push us out of the plane and then casually toss us a parachute after we’ve started free-falling. No, He takes us up the first few times just to go over the plan. Then, we do some lower jumps together in preparation. And even though the altitude keeps getting higher, it doesn’t mean it’s any easier when we are standing in the doorway looking down! It still takes courage (and a huge amount of faith!)
How did this experience effect or shape your passion today?
While I have fallen in love with the idea of home education (a direct result of the last year’s decision), I also have a very deep passion for obedience. And truthfully it is a tough word in our culture; it isn’t easy, or sexy, or fun. It’s often hard work— mentally and physically. It doesn’t promise instant rewards or a huge financial payout. But it’s what He asks of us.
If you could sum up your experience in a single sentence, what would it be?
Obedience
What would you say to a woman facing the same situation?
If God has asked you to do something, you better do it. I knew that homeschool was the best option for our family and I only dipped my foot in; I wasn’t really wanting to do it, and we were flailing around as a result. And the same was true for writing. I wasn’t really making an effort at improving my skills, connecting with other writers, or expanding my readership. I was doing the minimal in these two areas that I felt God wanted me to be pursuing. And the thing that was taking up the most of my energy was a job that I enjoyed (and was good at), but was taking the joy from my day. I look back and ask myself why I was so afraid to take the leap of faith and how much I missed in my unwillingness to trust Him.
Is there a favorite quote or scripture you have clung to?
Ephesians 3:20 is a life verse for me. I love the wording in the Message: “God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us.”
What does the word “authenticity” mean to you, and what does it look like in your everyday life?
Community and authenticity are two words that I hear over and over. We cry out for “authentic community” because we want something deeper than the social media highlights.
We want to leaders who are secure enough to admit they don’t have all the answers, aren’t the best at everything, and often make mistakes. We want relationships that go deeper than saying hi at our kid’s soccer practice, or shaking hands with the same 5 people at church every Sunday morning. We want friends who know when our marriage isn’t thriving and can keep us accountable to fix it rather than give up and circles of mentors and champions who know our dreams and will help make them a reality. We need a community that isn’t afraid to show the ugly parts because it is our safe place. “I yelled at my kids”, “I overspent on the credit card”, “I looked at pornography”, “I feel stuck at my job” are comments that don’t have to be said in shame if they are shared with people who love us graciously and pray for us powerfully.
That is the kind of community that I believe God desires us to have.
What role has mentorship played in your life, and what impact has it had on you?
I have been blessed throughout my life that there have always been women who are a little older (not my peer, but not quite my mother’s age) who have encircled me. They have helped care for and nurture my babies, cooked for me, listened while I cried, and prayed fierce prayers with me on the spot. They have allowed me a safe place to be raw with my emotions and feelings, and never guilted me for them. I wouldn’t say that I’ve ever been very active in finding such women; they have always just appeared, almost as if by God’s unique design
What are 2 things you’re loving right now?
Well, I love books, so I’ll share two: Brené Brown’s latest work, Rising Strong. It’s been a very slow read for me (which is unusual) because I’ve really needed, and wanted, to soak in the themes instead of rushing through the chapters. It’s been very good for me.
I’m also very excited about “Give Your Child The World” by Jamie C. Martin and her book club with Sarah McKenzie this summer. It’s a great way to expose your kids to different cultures; can’t wait to get started with that.
Thank you, Malinda! Where’s the best place to find you online?
Instagram has become like a “mini-blog” for me; I share daily @malinda.fuller.
My personal website is malindafuller.com
