Look pretty yummy, eh?
These are my husband’s favorite cookies.
Chocolate Chip Oatmeal.
I am embarrassed to admit: I had never actually made them before today.
{I know. Isn’t that awful?}
But being the ever-evolving, growing woman that I am,
I squelched my embarrassment and forged onward {ahem}.
I found a recipe and was delighted to discover we had all the ingredients {unusual occurrence in this household}. I summoned my 35 pound baking buddy, we donned our matching aprons and we got to work.
I felt like a true P31 wife.
Bakin’ up some goodness for my man, while {patiently} involving my {sloppy} assistant. Such domestic prowess, I tell you.
{I’m sure I heard theme music playing as I busily whipped these suckers up}.
Well. Let’s just say those warm fuzzies didn’t last very long.
Having not used shortening much, I didn’t know what to think of the stuff…but boy, did the smell ever bowl me over. I’ve always known it was bad stuff. Health wise. What with a stage name like ‘lard’, how good could it possibly taste?
But the eerie scent of paint thinner mixed with plastic…that was indeed unique.
My hubby guaranteed the smell would vaporize while his beloved cookies were turning all shades of golden in the oven.
It didn’t.
It wasn’t until we had devoured our first {of intended many} that we knew something was very wrong.
Like I said, I haven’t used shortening much.
Turns out we were still working our way through our very first carton.
Expiration: January 2007.
{gulp}
Is there a Proverbs 32 woman I could work towards?
So again I ask…look yummy?
Not. At. All.
Two words, my friends: dismal failure.
This would have been a happy baking post,
had that snippet of cookie photo
not come from this sad cookie photo…
The kicker: my husband – lover of chocolate chip oatmeal cookies – tossed these bad boys in the trash without blinking an eyelid.
Sorry babe.
I guess I’ll try again as soon as I remember to buy fresh lard. {Ooooh, sounds so sexy, doesn’t it?}
I’m aiming for 2013.
